i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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