I hate your face
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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