I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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