he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
