i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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