i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
