I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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