Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
