My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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