I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
She needs sedatives and a leash
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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