we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
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