i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
We were destined to go to rehab together
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
