You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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