dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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