yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
either way he was missing a nipple.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Randomize
