If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
My breasts were aching with rage.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
