If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
