Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
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