Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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