maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Randomize
