i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
