Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
