I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
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