I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize