Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize