For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
