just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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