This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
