what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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