Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
