i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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