Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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