I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
