i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
