Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
