does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
