so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize