Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
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