We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
4 words: hood of his car
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize