dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
pop tarts are not kleenex
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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