awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
