As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
