We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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