This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
