His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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