My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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