Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
