How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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