Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize