let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
When did angry sex become our thing?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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