He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
